Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Why so much sex and not enough love?

I watched the movie titled The 40- Year-Old Virgin and I must say, it was the best movie I have watched so far. This movie not only got great review for Hollywood’s toughest critics but it became an iconic movie in pop culture. I wondered how in a sex crazed/sex charged country like America this movie was a success among young people. The American culture (sex-saturated society) sends sexual messages through peer pressure and media that everyone is and should be having sex at all time, with lots of partners; that is why it seems laughable to the some people when they discover someone is a virgin. Andy world turn upside- down when his co-workers and friends discovered that he was a virgin.
It is very funny movie but it’s real-life because the message is; not everything have to be about sex, or losing ones virginity to find love or to feel better among friends. In the movie, I see a nice, hardworking, and sweet guy who does not know how to go about love, dating, and sex. He has pretty much given up on women and found solitude in his apartment; painting his action figures and playing his video games instead.
You get to wonder that Andy’s life is no fun at all for a single man like him. He should be out there dating and not be in seclusion or letting his co-workers make his decision of getting laid for him.
The film brilliantly is a combination of sweet and very offensive dialogs not good for young people under the age of 15.
The sex comedy teaches a very good message for teens and adults alike on topics like abstinence, love and having safe sex. These topics are discussed in a very funny but real way; it is like teaching sex education with crude humor and foul language.
Metaphorically, the countless toys and action figures replaced Andy’s virginity because it is the only way he had fun. When someone decides to lose his or her virginity, they must consider the right time and the right partner.
His unwillingness to approach women continued until he meets the woman of his dream Trish.
Before Andy met Trish he had to leave the comfort zone of his home to go with his co-workers to bars, hook-up parties, and look groomed for the ladies (the chest waxing scene). Funny enough it took him a long time to lose his virginity to her.
I read a surprising report on older virgins from a blog, by a San Francisco journalist Michael Castleman. The blog is titled Are There Really 40-Year-Old Virgins? The reports say
The study found two significant associations with older virginity: regular attendance at
religious services and abstinence from alcohol. However, in my interviews with older virgins and with the therapists who counsel them, those factors appear much less important than profound shyness, social awkwardness, and general discomfort with the opposite sex and the whole idea of physical intimacy with another person. As one told me: "I shut myself off. I can't really explain why, except to say I was very shy. I was keenly interested in women, but they intimidated me. I had no idea how to get beyond casual friendships to anything romantic, no idea at all.
"Fortunately, there's help for older virgins, surrogate partner
therapy. In fact, today, a substantial proportion of surrogate partners' clients are older virgin men. (Michael Castleman, 2011).
Everything Michael Castleman said in his blog, are the attributes of Andy the 40-Year-Old virgin. He is so socially inept with the woman and it like he cannot seem to get it on.
In the movie, I see his earlier sexual attempts with girls but his body seems to shut down or repel the girls. In the long run, the lesson learnt in the movie is that it is never too late to find love with that special someone to share ones life with.

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